Total Goal

Friday, January 26, 2007

Frustrating Friday! Its a love / hate thing.

TGIF or maybe not.

Earl is home for 2 whole days! I actually get to spend some time with both my boys. If Earl isn't working more. It sucks when that happens. He's been so busy. Oh and i only got 1 more wake up early and i get my sleep in day, which is Sunday.

On the other hand, my whole schedule gets all messed up. My flex points run out, and I'm tempted not to cook. Which is a bad thing when your on weight watchers. Friday used to be the pizza day, it would be so much easier just to pick up the phone. By the end of the week, I'm tired of the monotony of it all.

  • get up
  • change evan
  • feed evan
  • go outside for a smoke
  • have bkft
  • change evan again-morn poop by then
  • make bottles
  • watch evan/play with evan
  • feed evan cereal
  • watch evan/play with evan
  • change evan
  • go for another smoke outside
  • watch/play with evan some more
  • feed evan a bottle
  • put him down for a nap
  • try to find something to do, or take a nap to make the time pass faster.
  • evan wakes up
  • change evan
  • feed evan another bottle
  • play/watch him some more
  • feed evan dinner of baby food
  • make and eat dinner
  • play/watch evan more
  • change evan
  • bath evan
  • put evan to bed
  • spend the rest evening for myself and earl

Oh don't get me wrong, playing and spending time with my son is great its all the other things i do everyday. Day in and day out, repeat, repeat, repeat with no end in sight. Friday comes and I'm rearing to go out some where, something, "just get me out of here." But he's tired after his week of work, and sometimes he just wants to chill. Then i get mad and frustrated because I'm feeling restless.

I know there are others in the world that would kill to have this life. To have a beautiful baby boy or girl. I'm not complaining about the fact that i have a child. I guess I'm not really complaining at all except that its confusing sometimes. Who is this mommy person, how do i fit this new persona into my life, friendships, carrier etc.

By Friday all those thoughts come into my head. My schedule gets messed up, i really need a brake, but what to do about my WW points. Pizza is out of the question. So i cook dinner yet again, and another evening repeats as above. Then it's Saturday and hopefully I'll get out of the house and feel better again. Till Monday when it starts all over again.

1 comment:

the veggie paparazzo said...

There's nothing wrong with wanting a change or a break from the way your normal day-to-day life runs. It doesn't make you ungrateful--it just makes you real. Is there a mother's morning out type of thing where you could take your son for a few hours one day a week? Or a good daycare that could take him for a Friday afternoon while you take care of your own prerogatives, maybe?